Independence Day* - SFDWPs vs Park Street/Frogmore

(*No relevance to anything anywhere in this report but sounds good)

Well, the evening started very quietly as Glenn and I were ferried to the game, silently and smoothly, in Mark's tiny electric car - the BMW Electro-Cute. On arrival we joined an already relaxed and jovial atmosphere that continued to pervade for the rest of the evening. Park Street/Frogmore are a good bunch it has to be said and seem to have perfectly understood that wit and good humour win far more games than actual victories...ponder that one!

The Batting

It goes without saying that we lost the toss and were elected to bat first. If Mark didn't have a plan he showed no signs of it and requested his two strongest batsmen to open - Rupert and Colin. Rupert carefully selected the most bandaged bat that, although very popular throughout our innings, never quite delivered the required punch. Not one to blame his tool Rupert faced the first few balls from 'The Kid' (estimate: tall 7 year old) who thankfully took fractionally longer to get his eye in that Rupert but did prove a competent bowler. A good way of dealing with exam stress perhaps.

Colin and Rupert then ran up (with the emphasis on ran) a combined starting total of 23 before both being caught off two consecutive balls, both catching the top edge and taking a painfully vertical trajectory up and back down into the waiting hands of the gleeful wicket keeper.

Hot into the crease (sounds wrong I know) came Shaun and Simon W and set about regularly finding the boundary with nine 4s (Shaun 5, Simon 4) but the expected 6 from Shaun never materialized from the bandaged bat. It was noted by all spectators that Shaun wisely (some would say cynically) carefully blocked his would be last ball to ensure another over in retirement figures. This may well have been the point at which the opposition scorer took a more reserved approach to recording our boundaries.

Their retirement made way for our rhyming pair - Ben and Glenn. Simultaneously the number of birdwatchers on the pitch doubled. The occasional flock of Ring-necked Parakeets did not go unnoticed by Rupert and Ben, but Chris could be heard swearing under his breath, "Those bloody vermin...I'll get you yet!" This may also have, inadvertently, been another point at which the opposition scorer became less generous.

At this point, we must welcome Ben back to the fold, or at least the crease. After a long absence he answered the call when his team needed him the most and steadily built up a healthy score with a succession of 8 singles. At the very point when AGM shots of the Jan-type began to be muted he found the boundary at least twice although mysteriously not recorded in the scorebook. The boundary seeking came at a cost though and he was caught out by 'Alban' - clearly no saint.

Glenn on the other hand showed no such reserve and fired off a succession of 4s and our only 6, hitting a metal fence with a satisfying clang. He went on to retire and lived happily ever after.

Overs were running out but Chris had to weather some pretty sharp bowling, surviving by opting to leave a succession of in-swinging balls that whispered over the leg stump. Clearly Chris is a man used to dealing with a tolerance of millimetres not inches. Nevertheless, he did find the boundary and this is recorded in the scorebook.

Our score was looking healthy - 160 or maybe 170 or 180 - as Marcos came in to face the last three balls. This he did with suitable aplomb and a further 2 runs were added to the total. WG, Mark and Tim P did not bat.

All in all, an enjoyable batting innings for us with a reasonable pitch and a not too distant boundary. A peculiarity of this game was that balls were only faced from one end in the interest of saving time and preserving the many parked cars on the roadside. This did give the game the feel of Kwik cricket with batsmen changing ends after each over but whether this ultimately made any difference is debatable. Either way, fielding was not their strength and most shots allowed two runs. Their bowling did not threaten too much either with no one bowled out. Official final dubious score: 160 for 3

The Bowling

WG opened the bowling for us against one of the younger 'dads' in the opposition side with a dot ball. However, the batsmen began to find their groove and pushed for the single runs. Marcos bowled well but at the end of four overs Park Street had made a healthy 34 runs.

Rupert was up next and spent his usual over finding that line and length at a cost of 13 runs. His second over settled and would have been a maiden had she not left him for Juan Run.

Shaun opened the first of his 3 overs (one of the Park St dads 'could not bowl') with a satisfying wicket, sending a Mr Hester-Collins back to the pavilion/local den of iniquity. Shaun finished up with a respectable average of just 6.3 balls per over for 1 wicket and raised the drama a little with a pelting no-ball aimed at the batsman's head. The batsman survived and the tale is told.

Mr C Curtis then stepped up to the mark and bewildered the batsmen with a fine display of variable deliveries. This resulted in a wicket: a fine catch from Glenn at square leg. Nevertheless the runs crept up but step into the crease Mr Colin McKinnon and everything changes!

Colin bowls two batsmen in quick succession and suddenly Mr Curtis' hat-trick glory is under threat! The field close in to make it happen but somehow the gods ordain that the Curtis hat-trick is not to be touched my mortal hands...yet. With a wicket from Simon W (aka 'Phil formerly known as Diamond') Park Street suddenly appear to be collapsing.

Unfortunately, two of the eleven Dan's on the Park St team (their scorer has obviously been watching Alan Partridge's 'Dan joke') set about raising the run rate and the sight of a ball sailing high over our heads (and over the boundary) becomes all too familiar. Glenn keeps them pinned down but a six heralds the start of a run leakage that continues apace during Mark's overs.

This is not to disparage our fielding efforts which, by and large, were very good with not many balls escaping that could be fielded. Tim P acquitted himself well at wickie and there were a couple of near run-outs. Pink balls would have helped, but not everyone has pink balls it seems.

Of course, it was not long before it was all over in true Saddo style as Marcos undertook a spectacular slide-tackle on Colin in an attempt to allow the ball over the boundary for the winning 4 runs. He succeeded and the game was lost - Park Street 164 for 5 or thereabouts.

The Sausages

But not all was lost and what remained was a very pleasant evening of banter, chips and yes, SAUSAGES! Real sausages, some would say, big sausages. Washed down of course with beer at only £2 a pint*...no wonder Park Street are such a cheerful bunch. A fitting end to good game and let's leave those scores be, whatever they are. Good work Saddos! Marshalswicket up next!

*So much money was left over in the kitty that I did begin to wonder if we might ever get our own pavilion with the proceeds. Does the club shop do those Michael?